Tag: Gardening

Early deadheading and I set up chicken demarcation zones

I haven’t been able to blog for a few weeks as I have been locked in negotiations with Cruella (my wife) relating to the establishment of chicken demarcation zones in the garden. To be honest with you I am a mere pale shadow of myself, I have been the subject of constant vilification, I have had garden sit ins by angry chickens, I am not sleeping at night and Cruella has just told me I am to be the subject of an enquiry by the UN chicken rapporteur.

Anyway, let’s talk about some gardening, the chicken stuff I will explain at the end of this post.

30th April 2024. Things I have been doing lately:

  • Spring deadheading
  • Cleaning out ornamental grasses
  • Restructuring my garden with chicken demarcation zones

Spring deadheading. We often associate deadheading with the height of summer, but in fact there is lots you can be getting on with now, but you have to do it the right way or you will not get the best out of your plants next year. The plants you should be looking to deadhead now, include:

  • Roses
  • Spring bulbs
  • Ice plants
  • Aeoniums

Roses. With roses even at this time of year you should be looking to deadhead on a daily basis. Regular deadheading will reward you with fresh flushes of roses (depending on the type of rose). With roses all you have to do is use sharp secateurs to cut just above the next leaf node on the stem with the spent rose. Don’t be tempted to cut just below the spent flower as you will leave dead stem that not only looks ugly but both hinders repeat flowering and can act as a vector for disease. The photos below show where to deadhead. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Spring bulbs. Most spring bulbs will have finished flowering by now and they need deadheading. With bulbs it is important that you leave the stems and foliage to die back naturally ensuring that they release their last bits of energy back into the bulb for next year.

The first thing you need to do is to cut off the seed head. This consists of the dead flower and the bulge just below it on the stem. When you have cut the flower off then you need to leave the foliage to die back till it goes nicely brown. This can look untidy for a few weeks, but it is worth it to plump up your bulbs. Do not be tempted to tie the foliage into a knot which became fashionable a few years ago. If you do this then you are effectively cutting off the supply to the bulb. In just a few weeks time you can cut the dried foliage off right to soil level and plant over the area.

The first photo below shows some of my Spanish Irises ready for deadheading. The second photo shows where to cut them and the final photo shows how they will be left for a few weeks. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Ice plants. Are a spring favourite here in Spain and their early blossoms brighten up the spring garden. If you want to encourage profuse flowering in your plant next year and possibly be rewarded with a new flush of flowers this year, then you need to deadhead now.

To deadhead Ice plants you preferably need to replace your secateurs with shears or single handed lopers. If you look at the plant you will see that you have hundreds of little round spent flowers. You need to carefully shear these off making sure – if possible – not to damage the foliage or the existing flowers. It is a bit like going to the hairdressers and having a light trim all over.

The first photo below shows some of the ice plants around my water feature ready for their light trim. The second shows the trim in process. Remember try not to cut into the foliage. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Aeoniums. These are plants that provide year round interest in Spain. They are undemanding, and unpretentious yet in a subtle way quite showy. In my garden I have the two basic types the Verdi (green one) and the swartzkopf (chocolate). For most of the year these plants will provide structural interest in your garden, then suddenly they turn from ugly duckling to society beauty by throwing out a lovely yellow flower spike. See photo below.

Once these flower spikes have started to fade you need to cut them off from the stem. This is quite simple, all you need to do is look under the fading flower and you will see that the stem has begun to narrow in some cases quite dramatically. What is happening is the plant is getting ready to shed the flower by starving it of nutrition thereby encouraging it to drop off. All you need to do is cut the stem with your secateurs just below the narrowing part of the stem and that is it. The plant will seal the cut and carry on growing. See photo below.

Ornamental grasses. Ornamental grasses are often chosen by gardeners because they assume that as they are grass they will provide problem free plants. But this is not always the case. Grasses need a lot of water in Spain. They also suffer from dead centres and have to be separated every 5 years or so. Lastly, they need to have last years dead grass cleaned out or it will choke this years growth and look unsightly.

This is a simple process, you just need to put your garden gloves on and pluck away at the dead grass with an upward sharp tug. The properly dead grass will come away and leave you with growing space that lets in light and air for your new growth. The photos below show me happily plucking away at some of my grasses. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Restructuring my garden with chicken demarcation zones. From the introduction to this post you can see that I have been having major problems with Cruella (my wife) and her chickens, all of which have suddenly come to a head. Regular readers of this blog will know that Cruella and her 4 chickens have wreaked havoc on my garden.

This has caused arguments, tears, threats of violence and witchcraft. Cruella has regularly cited international bodies that are on her side, in the past this has included the EU, the UN the ECHR and even NATO. Recently she said that we should be spending at least 2.5% of our income on her chickens she quoted NATO and Rushi Sunak.

The end result of protracted wrangling is that I eventually prevailed upon Cruella and her chickens that we needed clear demarcation zones in the garden where the chickens can peck (destroy). All of this only came about as our previous two smaller lawns had been picked up by NASA satellites as expanding areas of desertification. The photos below are worth a thousand words. Click on each photo for a larger view.

The mesh you can see lying on the ground was my vain attempts to stop them digging holes
I didn’t bother on this lawn, I just gave up

I started by marking out the areas that would be returned to gardening and two clear zones where the chickens could peck. To say this was controversial is an understatement. Every time I marked out an area Cruella and the chickens would protest and mark out a much larger area. Further days were lost by lines being marked and then crossed out overnight. Cruella and the chickens even staged sit-ins at various times to stop me getting on. When I tried to move them they all went limp and made me drag them out of the way, and as I moved each one the others rushed back in. The photos below shows some of the chaos. Click on each photo for a larger view.

I am only telling you all this not because I am seeking your sympathy, but rather because there is a good gardening point here. Too often in Spain people cover their garden with acres of unsightly gravel, for the practical purpose that it makes it all easier. However, this turns many gardens in Spain into what looks like giant car parks. You don’t have to do this, and even if your garden is already like this, then why not take the opportunity to brighten and refresh your garden with island planting.

At its simplest island planting means creating beds of greenery within your gravelled areas. The benefits of this are so obvious I am not even going to make the point. Instead, if you want to create islands of greenery then this is how to do it.

There are 6 key stages to creating islands in gravelled areas.

  • Mark out the overall area with ground spray paint
  • Apply weed suppressing membrane
  • Mark where you want your island beds directly onto the membrane
  • Connect up irrigation if appropriate
  • Cover with gravel; or push back existing gravel
  • Cut through membrane to create beds and plant up

Mark out the overall area. Think carefully about the size of area you are going to gravel as you will have to live with it. The photos below show the tools for the job, plus early attempts at agreeing area size. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Apply weed suppressing membrane. It is important that you buy good weed suppressing membrane. You are hopefully only going to do this once so make sure you don’t buy cheap stuff that tears and splits. The photos below show various stages of applying the membrane. If you are planting beds in existing gravelled areas then make sure you pull the gravel much further back than your island beds, so that you can pull it back when you are finished. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Mark where you want your island beds directly onto the membrane. This is an important stage so it is worth not only thinking carefully about it, but marking and then waiting 24 hours to think again. Using the ground paint mark out the shape you would like for your island beds. In my case I wanted different sized circles. It is also useful to place objects where you think you want your beds and then walking around and looking at them from different angles to make sure your happy with your sight lines. The photos below show this process in action. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Connect up irrigation. If you are going to use irrigation then now is the time to set your pipe work in place. If you already have gravel then try and connect up to your existing system. The photos below show my artistic connections. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Cover with gravel; or push back existing gravel. Whatever your choice of gravel you will need to allow for coverage of about two inches. This is necessary to ensure you don’t get bare patches opening up as you walk around. Gravel is exceptionally heavy and is hard work to distribute, so if you can get help or use professionals. I had no help, Cruella and her chickens just sat back eating posh snacks whilst I laboured in the Sun. When I asked them for some help they all started chanting slogans about not taking part in their own oppression. The photos below show the extent of my challenge. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Cut through membrane to create beds and plant up. This is the most enjoyable part as you begin to see the fruits of your efforts. I have covered the issue of planting through membrane before, but just in case your new to this the process is simple.

Start by cutting an X shape in your membrane and fold back the flaps of your X. The soil under gravel will normally be quite impoverished and dry so it is necessary to enrich the planting hole. First dig a planting hole slightly larger than your plant. Fill this with water and let it drain, then enrich the hole with good compost digging around to ensure the existing soil is loose.

Place your plant in its new home and make sure to firm the soil around it before folding back the flaps of membrane and then watering profusely. It is a good idea to fill the area around your plants with a different colour gravel. This gives added interest to your planting scheme and also provides contrast in the winter when your plants have died back. The photos below show my finished effort. Click on each photo for a larger view.

I was just sitting down having a well earned cup of tea when Cruella (my wife), approached me accompanied by her chickens. She began reading from a piece of paper which she said had just arrived from NATO claiming that a military drone had noted that my planting and gravel were in breach of the Geneva Convention. She went on to say that they demand that the land should immediately be returned to its intended use as a Chicken designated zone of special scientific interest.

I told her I didn’t believe her as the back of the piece of paper was headed Church Sunday School. She started crying, the chickens all started cackling in Chickenese and they all stormed off shouting about lawyers. Hey Ho.

Trees, bees and bereavement

What about the above for the headline of a blog post. It has everything alliteration, drama and a hint of menace. However, now that we are swinging into summer there are a number of things you should be doing, and a number of things you should stop doing. So this is what I will be covering in this post.

  • What you should be doing with your citrus trees and other fruits
  • Dealing with seedlings
  • Time to give roses a feed and mulch
  • Check your irrigation system and timers
  • The final days of the big Agave Attenuata
  • I am getting bees

6th April 2024 Things I have been doing lately.

What you should be doing with your citrus trees and other fruits. By now all of your citrus trees should be in full bloom. So it is time to stop messing around with them and just let them get on with it. Don’t cut, don’t prod, don’t replant, just leave them alone. There are however, three exceptions.

Firstly, make sure that you remove any suckers that are growing on the trunk of your trees. Suckers are bright green, pliable small shoots that have a habit of popping out on your tree trunks this time of year (especially on older trees). Suckers take away the goodness from your tree before it gets to the leaves and fruit. Especially deleterious are suckers growing from below the earth at the foot of the trunk as these will often be growing from below the graft and will probably be root stock. The photos below show examples of suckers on my trees. Click on each photo for a larger view.

The simplest way to deal with suckers is to don your gardening gloves and go around pulling sharply down on each sucker. If you catch suckers early they will come away very easily. However, if they have been left for a while they will have hardened to wood, in this case you will need your secateurs, and need to cut as close to the trunk as possible. If you leave a spur it will grow back.

Secondly, go around each of your trees and look for branches that are absolutely dead – no leaves and definitely no blossom. By now these are definitely dead so you can cut them right back. This process lets air and light into the tree; but remember no other cutting. The photo below shows me actively hunting dead branches.

Thirdly, you should have been actively feeding your citrus from January; so if you haven’t been, get on with it. There are a variety of feeds you can use whether pelleted or liquid, but you must always use a citrus feed rather than a general purpose feed. I also find it helps if you can give them a glug of iron. The photo below shows some of the feeds that I use.

In addition to feeding citrus trees you can start feeding other fruiting trees and vines. In this case do not use citrus feed, but another specialist feed for fruiting plants. The feed second from the left in the photo above is the one I use.

Dealing with seedlings. Normally by this time of year I have a potting bench full of seedlings ready for pricking out and potting on. However, this year has been a disaster. Apart from the chicken vandalism; which I mentioned in my last post, whereby the chickens threw over my mini greenhouse and killed all my first seeds. I resowed them all and then inflicted another disaster on myself. Because of the changeable weather I left all my seedling trays in my mini greenhouse for the day whilst I was out, but unfortunately the sun came blazing back and by the time I got home all my seeds had been baked..

The photos below show the various stages of disaster with my mini greenhouse. I have tried to rescue what I can but as you can see very few seeds have germinated. Don’t let this put you off planting seeds, they are normally a fantastic way to stock your garden and improve your gardening skills. You can still plant seeds now, but make sure you do not put them in a mini greenhouse, but instead make sure they are out of the sun for the fiercest part of the day. The one consolation I have is that my cuttings and bare root plants are coming on fine. Click on each photo for a larger view.

My one area of success this year

Time to give roses a feed and mulch. Roses grow surprisingly well in Spain, but it is time now to mulch them and feed them to get the best blooms this summer. Before feeding I highly recommend that you mulch. This is a simple process involving 3 stages.

  1. Hoe all around your roses to remove all weeds, you can do this by hand but it can be a bit prickly.
  2. Water your roses profusely.
  3. Apply a thick mulch of about two inches using either bark or compost.

Once you have mulched then you can start to apply feed. Roses are hungry feeders so I feed once every month. The photos below show the mulching process followed by a photo of the feed that I use (others are available). Click on each photo for a larger view.

Check your irrigation system and timers. Irrigation and timers are essential in the Spanish garden. I know you think you will remember to water your plants, but you will forget and they will start to die. However, irrigation timers are no good to you if they have run out of battery or your irrigation pipes are leaking all over the place.

I have 6 separate irrigation timers in the various parts of my garden and a couple of hundred yards of irrigation pipe. Now is the time to go around and change all the batteries in your timers. Once you have changed your batteries, turn your irrigation on (one at a time) and wander round checking for leaks. The photos below show some of my irrigation issues, including all the various instructions for my many and varied timers and a few leak issues. Click on each photo for a larger view.

The final days of the big Agave Attenuata. Regular readers of this blog will know that one of my large Agave Attenuata has flowered spectacularly and is now dying. As a mark of respect for the dying plant I spend days in quiet contemplation and discussion with the plant as the end comes near. We talk about all the good times when she was a mere pup and laugh about how she kept bending the wrong way when I wanted her to grow in another direction. She is obviously concerned for her pups but I have reassured her and promised I will always look after them.

Sadly the end is here. We always spend the last few hours singing her favourite arias. We have been singing Madame Butterfly with her taking the part of Cio-Cio-San (Madama Butterfly), whilst I reluctantly play the part of Lieutenant Pinkerton. We end with the tragedy of Cio-Cio San’s suicide whilst singing “Con onor muore”. I asked Cruella (my wife) to take some photographs during the aria so that I could keep her memory alive for her pups.

The photos below show us singing. Her final words were “Io muoio con onore”; if you look carefully you can see that I am crying. Cruella just laughed and said she couldn’t hear the plant singing and all the neighbours think I am mad. I told her she can’t hear the plant singing as it requires a soul. Click on each photo for a larger view.

An especially tender moment
It’s over she has gone

I am getting bees. I must confess I was a little bit down for a few days after the Agave death. Even Cruella was worried about me and decided to ask me what I wanted for my birthday, I said no it’s ok. But she insisted, saying go on I will get you anything you want. And that’s how I am getting bees. Watch this space. The photo below shows my hive ready assembled for their arrival at the end of the month. I have even planted them a little flower bed to welcome them.

It’s mulch wars and I am forced to pay a maggot ransom

Hooray it’s Spring, Cruella (my wife) has flown off to our English house and I am free to merrily prepare the garden for summer unhindered. I started going about my tasks with joy in my heart a spring in my step and a glint in my eye, but unfortunately things soon took a dark turn and I have become a victim of serious garden chicken crime. Anyway more of that later, on with the gardening.

11th March 2024. Things I have been doing lately:

There are a number of jobs we need to be getting on with in Spring.

  • Lift and separate Cannas
  • Guarding against Palm Weevils
  • Applying mulch to flower beds
  • Fighting and losing the mulch wars

Lift and separate Cannas. I call this the Wonderbra treatment – I recognise this is both accurate and sexist. If you grow cannas then you will know that they are delightful plants that provide wonderful flower spikes that add height and drama to any garden. Unfortunately here in Spain drought is taking a toll on canna rhizomes (ugly bulbs) as they are drying up and failing to thrive. Normally you can happily leave cannas in the soil and the rhizomes will gradually multiply and provide you with more plants.

However, by this time of year I should have been seeing the first shoots of my cannas poking through, but when they failed to reveal themselves I have had to dig them up, separate them and give them a good drink before replanting them. Luckily my friend Pip has regifted back to me some cannas I had previously given to her, so I was able to replenish my stock. The first photo shows my cannas ready for some work followed by them having a drink by soaking for 24 hours in a trug before replanting. Click on each photo for a larger view.

When replanting canna, they need to be planted shallowly in rich but free draining compost. Where there are shoots from the rhizomes these need to be left poking from the soil. The photos below show the planting process. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Guarding against Palm Weevils. The problem of Palm weevils won’t really mean that much to those of you who don’t live in Spain. But, if you live in Spain and you have Phoenix palms, then you dread the advent of palm weevil season. For those of you who are mere disinterested bystanders the photo below shows the culprit together with its malignant grub.

The modus operandi of this weevil is to lay its eggs at the base of Phoenix palm fronds. When hatched into grubs, they merrily chomp their way up inside the fronds and in most cases destroying the tree. The weevil can be treated by spraying the crown of the palm with a proprietary chemical, but there are two main problems with this. Firstly, unless you know what you are looking for, the weevil grubs can remain undetected until it is too late. Secondly, many palm trees are much to tall for the normal gardener to reach the crown and therefore require specialist contractors.

You can guard against Palm weevils. The easiest way is not to cut your palms between the end of March and October. The adult weevil flys only in the hot months, and I am assured by experts that it can smell a cut palm frond from a very long distance.

In addition to not cutting my palms at certain times, I have drilled holes into the centre of my very large palms into which I drip a chemical during the summer months which allows the sap to take the chemical to the palm crown making it a poisonous environment for Palm weevils. If you want to find out more about this method then just use the search bar on this blog to search for Palm weevils as I have covered this in detail in past posts. The photos below show my poisoning technique in action, followed by some photos of some of my newly cut palms. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Applying mulch to flower beds. I have waxed lyrical in the past about the importance of compost to the soil of all Gardens. A good friable soil rich in nutrients and natural enzymes is the perfect medium in which all plants will thrive. Compost bought from garden centres will have been violently heat treated to kill off weed seeds, which in turn can damage or destroy the micro nutrients. So if you possibly can set yourself up a compost bin or two. The photo below shows my compost bins in action.

Applying a deep mulch to your flower beds at this time of the year will remarkably improve even the most depleted of soils. There are three basic stages to mulching:

  1. Hoe the flower beds to remove all weeds
  2. Water profusely
  3. Apply a thick mulch of compost at least 2 inches thick

If you haven’t got your own compost then buy a good one from a garden centre, or if you prefer use shredded bark (though this will not instantly improve the soil). The photos below show my flower beds in the process of being mulched. Notice in the last photo some of the big fat worms from my compost making their way into the soil, you only get this benefit by making your own compost. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Fighting and losing the mulch wars. Who would have thought that an innocent activity such as mulching could be the cause of so much grief. I mentioned earlier that Cruella (my wife) had flown off to our English house to continue her nurturing of our idiot son. I had been left in charge of Tango the lonely blind Labrador and the bloody chickens.

As you can imagine this caused immense resentment by the chickens who refused to accept my authority, wouldn’t go to bed at night, ate junk food and continually swore at me in Chickenese (or at least I think they were). Cruella also insisted that I left my IPad in their coop on FaceTime so that she could could converse with them at all times.

At first this didn’t bother me I happily got on with mulching around all my fruit trees accompanied by Tango the lonely blind Labrador. The photo below shows all my trees lovingly mulched.

However, no sooner had I completed the mulching and retired indoors for a nice cup of tea, when I heard loud chicken squawking. I emerged to the terrible sight of the chickens frolicking under the trees and kicking my newly completed mulch all over the place. The photos below show the extent of the venal criminality. Click on each photo for a larger view.

I managed to scare them off with my water pistol (which is in breach of the restraining order Cruella took out against me) I was assisted by Tango the lonely blind Labrador who did his best running around barking and banging into trees. I could see the seething resentment in the chickens little eyes and I knew this wouldn’t be the end of it.

What happened next is like something from a horror film. The next morning I emerged to find that my mini greenhouse had been knocked over and all my lovingly planted seedlings had been destroyed. The photo below fails to convey the anguish and sense of loss; it was so bad that I even mentioned it in Church at the end of a sermon. Anyway I knew it was them as there were feathers everywhere.

I phoned Cruella (my wife) straight away to confront her but she completely refuted any suggestion that her girls were involved. She then asked for privacy so that she could have a FaceTime conversation with her girls. They all trooped off to the coop and emerged smirking 10 minutes later (I’ve told you before chickens really can smirk). A few minutes later the phone rang and it was Cruella (my wife) she told me that her girls had denied any involvement, but they had said that if I would supply them with maggots from the compost bins then they would keep an eye on my mini greenhouse to ensure nothing happens in the future. I complained that this was blackmail but she merely replied that this was “mulch ado about nothing” which she thought was hilarious.

The upshot of all this is that I have been paying a ransom of maggots every day since. If ever I forget to give them some, then one of them goes up and makes a big show of just bumping into the mini greenhouse ‘by accident’. The photos below show me paying the daily ransom. Click on each photo for a larger view.

It’s time to sow, I sing to the dying Agave and have a bad Valentine’s Day

It’s warming up, there is a hint of buds and we gardeners are waking from our winter torpor, it’s almost Spring, and you know what Spring means – seeds! Yes, it’s time to start thinking about how you will fill your Summer garden with floriferous beauty, and there is no better way than to grow your own garden from seed. I know that lots of you love to rush off to the Garden Centre and stack your trolley high with all sorts of unsuitable plants. But think how much more fulfilling it will be if you can grow your own garden.

Now I am not being a purist, of course you can buy plants, but why not give seeds a chance (start with a couple of easy to grow packets) once you start it is addictive and may I say a lot cheaper. As you can tell from my enthusiasm I have already got things underway. I was so filled with the joys of gardening that I rushed out and got Cruella (my wife) a Valentines Day gift. Sadly it all went wrong as the chickens deliberately sabotage my efforts. Anyway on with the gardening.

24th February 2024. Things I have been doing lately:

  • Harvesting self sown seedlings
  • Sowing the first seeds
  • Harvesting and sowing Chilli seeds
  • Preparing for the death of Agave Attenuata
  • Regretting my Valentines Day purchase

Harvesting self sown seedlings. One of the best way to get your garden going in Spring, is to take a look around your flower beds and check for any self sown seedlings that your summer flowers may have left you as a gift. One of the most prolific self sowers in Spain is the Maragaritte Daisy/Osteospermum. These lovely long flowering Daisies will drop hundreds of seeds which by now will have formed into little seedlings. The photo below shows just one part of my garden with thousands of seedlings.

But the trick is not to leave the seedlings where they have self sown, instead you need to harvest them and pot them up to let them grow on a bit before planting them out where you want them. The photos below show me harvesting the seedlings by gently prising them out of the soil with a trowel before placing each seedling into individual seedling trays. Note the close attention from big Bertha. (she has reverted and is no longer known as Bert, it was something to do with the chest binders that Cruella bought from John Lewis). Click on each photo for a larger view.

I have to cover the seedlings with glass as the Blackbirds will soon be digging

Sowing the first seeds. There is nothing better than contemplating the seeds you harvested from last year and deciding which order you are going to sow them. The photo below shows my preparations and the delight of contemplating things to come. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Before you get carried away with sowing seeds there is some basic preparation you need to undertake. If you are sowing into pots or seed trays you have used before, then it is important that you thoroughly wash them inside and outside. The last thing you want to do is carry over viruses and pathogens that are lurking in the residue of last year’s soil. All that is basically required is that you use a powerful hose jet to wash away any soil residue. The photos below show some of my seed trays after their annual ablutions. Click on each photo for a larger view.

inside
and out

Once you are ready to sow your seeds then you need to mix a good compost (not from China shop) together with Perlite to form a nice free draining medium that will not leave your little seeds waterlogged. Most seeds mainly require sprinkling on the surface of your compost then covering with a light sprinkling of compost.

Once you have lightly tamped down the surface to ensure seed and soil contact, then you need to place your seeds trays in a light warm area such as a window sill, or greenhouse. Be careful of fierce sun as this will dry the compost out to quickly. I buy a cheap little mini green house and use it for 2 or three years and then discard and start again. You will only need it for a couple of months at the most. The photos below show my seed sowing activity followed by my seed trays resting in their new home. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Harvesting and sowing Chilli seeds. Chilli plants are a joy to grow as they are so prolific. I leave my chilli plants to fruit over a two year period with just a chop back at the end of the year. The third year I remove the old plants and sow new seed in lovely fresh compost. By doing this I am getting rid of the old tired compost and creating a whole new generation of plants. The first photo below show my tired old plants heading for the compost heap, followed by the ripe seed pods that I have left on the plants and which will form my next generation.
Click on each photo for a larger view.

Getting the seeds is very simple. Using a scalpel, or very sharp knife, slice carefully down the side of the dried seed pod and carefully tease out the seeds that will be there waiting for you. The photos below show my scalpel work, together with the gathered seeds. The final photo shows the seeds scattered evenly across a seed tray before being lightly covered with compost. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Preparing for the death of Agave Attenuata. Losing any plant is a dreadful experience for us gardeners. We tend them, nurture them, watch them grow day by day and experience joy when they flower. That makes it all the more poignant when you lose an Agave Attenuata.

These lovely plants are very popular in Spain as they are one of the few “unarmed Agaves”, by this I mean they neither have teeth or spikes so won’t stab or cut you. They also have a charming habit of creating lots of pups which eventually surround them like a loving family. They take a long time to flower (12-20 years) and like lots of Agaves, when they do, they die leaving only their orphaned pups to cope on their own. The photo below shows a family of orphaned pups who lost their Mum about 5 years ago.

Eventually one of the orphans will go on to adopt the role of mother but it can take a long time. I think the one at the back right is shaping up to be Mum.

Regular readers of this blog will know that I have been lucky enough to see a number of my Attenuata flower. It has always been a painful process made much worse by the mockery of Cruella (my wife) who constantly heckles me in my sorrow by shouting “it’s only a plant, get over it”. On one occasion she proposed what she termed “assistant plant dying” and said that both me and the plant should go off to Dignitas!

As always on these occasions I conduct myself with dignity and commit my evenings to sitting by the plant as it flowers. We talk over old times, when it was just a little pup and I reassure her that all her pups will be taken care of when she goes. The photos below show my cherished Agave developing her flower spike. The beauty of the flower spike is marred by the tragedy of her oncoming demise. Click on each photo for a larger view.

As her flower spike gets taller so she gets weaker, and this is when I start to sing. All Agaves have a tendency for classical opera, so I tend to sing arias mainly from Puccini and especially La Bohéme.

We start early on when she has accepted she is going. I hold her flower spike and sing “Che gelida manini”. As we progress she takes on the part of Mimi and I Rodolfo as she coquettishly sings “Sì, mi chiamano Mimì”. We both then finish the day with “O Soave faniculla” the pups act as the chorus and as she finishes on the famous high “C” we are all in tears. I am dreading the future. The photos below show us singing the first act, if you look carefully you can see the pups leaning into the chorus whilst visible signs of decay can now be seen on their mum. We shall sing the famous deathbed scene of Act 4 in a couple of weeks, in the meantime I am giving bereavement classes to the pups. Click on each photo for a larger view.

“Che gelida manini”
“O Soave faniculla”

Regretting my Valentines Day purchase. As if things weren’t bad enough with my poor Agave, Cruella (my wife) had demanded that I make an effort for Valentines Day and get her something romantic. I racked my brain for days and eventually came up with the perfect present that was both practical, stylish, and suited to her personality. At great cost I bought her a new titanium based, multi positional short take off and landing broom. The photos below show this wonder of modern technology in both its extended long take off mode and its shortened take off mode.

Given that most of her current brooms are what you would term shoddy, I thought she would be delighted. She took one look at it and proclaimed “I wouldn’t be seen dead on that modern crap”. She stormed off in a huff and spent all of Valentine’s Day with her chickens murmuring darkly in chickenese whilst occasionally giving me black looks. The upside was that I could get on with sowing seeds!

The big winter cutback Part 4: The terror of trees and I am referred to a Tribunal accused of making the sky fall in!

So this is it we have finally reached the end of the big winter cutback. It has taken about a month and I have left the worst till last. Regular readers of this blog will know that I always finish the cutback by tackling my large Ficus tree. I cut out the centre of this tree about 10 years ago to make a pleasing donut shape, but the tree has never forgiven me and takes every opportunity to do me harm. To be honest it comes second only to Cruella (my wife) in threatening my existence. I have fallen out of it, had branches fall on me, it has made me bleed, bashed and concussed me on numerous occasions.

And now you know why I leave this task to the very end. I have to work up my courage through extra physical exercises, primal scream therapy and I channel my inner Robert De Niro every time I look at the tree by shouting loudly “you looking at me…”. But it knows I am afraid despite all my braggadocio, I can see it smirk.

Anyway as if all that wasn’t bad enough Cruella (my wife) confronted me after my struggles with the tree and presented me with what she said was a writ, which she later said was a warrant. Anyway, whatever it was she just flashed this piece of paper in front of me and said it was official. But to be honest all I could see was some gobble-de-gook in her handwriting with a drawing of a chicken in the corner. Hey-ho more later, on with the gardening.

6th February 2004. Things I have been doing lately

Reshaping the little Weeping Fig. By way of warming up before the battle with the big Ficus, I decided to reshape my little weeping fig tree. Lots of people in Spain have these variegated weeping figs in their garden. They are lovely little trees that give colour and interest to even the smallest garden. However, because they are slow growing they can just sit there and be forgotten about.

To make them interesting you should consider cloud pruning them in to various shapes. Remembering that they are slow growing so don’t be too drastic and do it over a few years. The photo below shows the little fig with its trunk exposed (which I did a few years ago).

As it was time for its annual prune and I decided to prune back the lower growth with the eventual aim of having two pom poms of leaf with exposed trunk below and in the middle. The photo below shows the end result. I think it is quite fetching.

The battle with the big Ficus. The trouble with this annual battle is that I am getting older, smaller and weaker, whilst the tree is similarly getting older, but at the same time getting bigger and stronger. How long I can continue I don’t know, but I do know that if you show fear to rabid dogs or large trees then you are finished.

I always start this task the same way; I get Cruella (my wife) to take various picture of me posing in bravura poses in and around the tree. Then I assemble the various tools that I will need and leave them close to the tree to try and psyche it out. The photos below show the big tree in all its malevolence followed by my efforts at psyching it out. Click on each photo for a larger view.

I start the process by using my long reach electric trimmers to walk around the circumference of the tree gradually bringing the sides back into shape. The tree of course responds with ill will by continually dropping things onto my head and into my eyes. I keep my spirits up be singing hymns as I march round and round – onward Christian Soldiers is a favourite. The tree responds by moaning “the trees of the field”. The end of the first phase can be seen in the photos below. Click on each photo for a larger view.

The next, and most dangerous phase, involves climbing up into the tree, pruning the top flat and redefining the central donut. The photos below show me in the tree, this time I’m singing “nearer my God to thee”. The tree was singing “the fall of man how deep and great”. Click on each photo for a larger view.

The ascent of man
I know you can’t see me but I am standing in the middle of the tree cutting away.

After it was all over my final act is to place the Cheshire Cat back into the centre of the tree.

The Cheshire Cat smiles for another year.

My appearance before the Tribunal. After all the highs and excitement of conquering the big tree for another year, you can only imagine my disappointment at being confronted by Cruella and her supposed writ/warrant. What it all came down to was that her chickens had complained that my activities in the big tree was making the sky fall in as things kept landing on their heads. To back this up she showed me the photos below as evidence. Click on each photo for a larger view.

When I complained that she had been reading her chickens the bedtime story of Chicken Licken which has exactly the same plot when the sky supposedly falls in on Henny Penny. She drew her self up to her full height thrust her hand out into my face and shouted loudly “always believe the chicken and not the hetro-normative establishment”.

Anyway she insisted there had to be a trial. Her jury consisted of the chickens. I was not allowed to call any witnesses in my own defence. When I tried to call big Bertha her biggest chicken as a witness on my behalf, there was a sudden cacophony of noise from all the chickens (in chickenese of course). Cruella then accused me of dead naming Bertha who now goes by the name Bert. As I looked across at Bertha I knew I had messed up as she was now sporting a waistcoat and smoking a pipe.

Well it was all down hill from there. Cruella called a whole range of witnesses including: Cocky-Locky, Ducky-Lucky, Goosey-Loosey and Turkey-Lurkey all of whom damned me in no uncertain terms. The end result is that I have been found guilty of a hate crime and sent into exile at our English house for a few weeks.

The big winter cutback Part 3: and I am referred to a Tribunal accused of making the sky fall in!

Well by now most of you should have just about completed your big winter cutback and this is my penultimate instalment of my marathon effort. This of course only applies to those of us who don’t have frosts, some of you might not even have started yet – good luck.

This post covers the following areas and plants of my garden:

  • cutting back trailing lantana
  • pruning grape vines
  • cutting palms
  • bringing hedges back into shape

31st January 2024. Things I have been doing lately:

Cutting back trailing lantana. I use trailing lantana and other trailing plants in many areas of my garden as part of island planting which I use to break up and add interest to areas of stones and gravel. The photos below show some of my lantana islands. Click on each photo for a larger view.

When cutting back lantana it pays to be brave. Using your secateurs cut back hard to just above a leaf juncture. By taking it back this far you will be removing most of the old wood and encouraging strong new foliage in just a few weeks. When you do this the plant itself will actually get larger each year as you are cutting it back on much larger root stock.

When cutting back low growth plants at this time of year be sure to wear your garden gloves. Snakes and all sorts can be happily hibernating under your plants and they don’t like being disturbed. The photos below show my lantana happily cutback together with a large toad sleeping away. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Even Cruella’s chickens were too scared to wake it up.

Pruning back grape vines. When pruning grape vines you are looking to just take off the side shoots to leave a small stump for the new fruit growth. Do not cut the main stem! the aim is to leave this to thicken and lengthen over the years to act as a superhighway for the sap for the whole vine. The photo below shows the best place to cut.

Don’t be tempted to cut right to the stem as you will lose the fruit.

I have three grapevines: one runs along the front of the house and two grow through balustrade at the side of my pool. The photos below show my grapevines prior to pruning, you can also see that I have encouraged one of my vines to grow up and through a Euphorbia. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Finally some of my handiwork. These vines will start sprouting within a month and off we go again. With correct pruning the vine will get stronger each year and eventually before you know it you will be making your own wine. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Cutting palms. Now is the time to prune and tidy up your palms as the sap will be down, the palm weevil will not be flying and most viruses will be dormant. However, do not be tempted to climb large palms and hack at them. You will probably fall off the ladder or cut yourself and bleed profusely. Leave it to the professionals.

The only palms I cut myself are Sago Palms and European Fan Palms, both of which I can reach from the ground with long lopers. I dealt with cutting sago palms earlier in the big cutback so I was left with my stand of fan palms. These consist of four main palms and their multitude of pups which grow in a small redonda we have created in a pathway. The photo below shows the palms prior to their cutback.

From the photo you can see that it is becoming an important feature of the garden. To stop it dominating and overwhelming this part of the garden it is necessary to thin it, reshape it and lift the crown of each palm.

Using long lopers I first go round the edges of the palms cutting out wayward fronds that are ruining the round shape. For the bottom growth I am not so worried about keeping the symmetry of the palm I am more interested in keeping the lower growth within the redonda.

Once I am happy with the lower shape I then use very long extended lopers to take the top growth of each palm back to just two rows of fronds. The two row bit is important as I will always have a spare if something happens to one of them. The photos below show the resultant frond massacre. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Bringing hedges back into shape. Hedges are an important part of my garden as they mark boundaries so much better than fences, and they flower, which fences never do. I have about 200 metres or more of hedges all tightly packed and encouraged to fight to earn the right to flower. These include:

  • Bignonia
  • Plumbago
  • Trumpet vine
  • Jasmine
  • Roses
  • Bower vine
  • Bougainvillea
  • Hibiscus

In addition to all of the above I have two self seeded trees that have found their way in: a white maple and pomegranate both of which add a bit of contrast in height. The rule with hedges is very simple; everything is cut back drastically to the same height, with the edges taken back straight to encourage light into other areas. The photos below show my hedges before, during and after their prune. Click on each photo for a larger view.

The final act of hedge pruning is to shred the thicker stems from the maple and the pomegranate and use them as mulch under other trees. Click on each photo for a larger view.

I am referred to a Tribunal. I am too upset to cover this item in this post, and also I have to prepare my defence against accusations of making the sky fall in. Hopefully, I will be able to talk about it in my next post.

The big winter cutback Part 2: Figs and Roses + Grass

Who knew that gardening could be so Rock and Roll; I always thought Guns and Roses was a stupid name anyway. If you have roses and figs, then now is the time to get them pruned back. Add a little bit of grass for you old hippies and we are really rocking. To think that Cruella (my wife) thinks that gardening is boring. Without further ado, let’s get on with the big cutback .

17th January. Things I have been doing lately:

Pruning Roses. People sometimes make out that there is a lot of mystique about the timing and methods of pruning back roses. But roses are very hardy and can take quite a lot of rough handling. The photos below show some of my roses ready for their annual prune. Click on each photo for a larger view.

It is important to remember that climbing roses are pruned differently to bush roses. With climbing roses I recommend running hedge trimmers lightly up the length of the plant just removing excess side growth without cutting the upward stems. In this way you will maintain height but get rid of bulk. The photos below show my climbing roses before and after their trim. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Now if like me you have lots of roses (I have 30) then pruning can be quite a time consuming process, so I recommend that you do it in two linked stages. First, be brave and get out your hedge trimmer or shears and just prune back all your roses to the required height – I recommend taking off at least two thirds of the height.

Second, get on your knees and prune each individual plant as follows. With bush roses the simplest method is to prune back by about two thirds to the nearest outward facing bud joint. As part of this process take out any crossing or diseased stems to leave a nice open centre to the plant a bit like a wine glass. The photos below show my roses pruned. Click on each photo for a larger view.

The more perceptive amongst you will note that the final photograph shows that you can barely see the pruned rose from the leaf debris and grasses growing through. I am sorry to tell you that this is when it gets difficult and when the real hard work starts. Oh and unfortunately you will lose a lot of blood. Using a pointed trowel you need to get under each rose and remove all the leaf debris and dig out the weeds and grasses. The rose thorns will get you no matter how good your gardening gloves and you will bleed quite a lot.

This is the important part so please pay attention. Sepsis though rare affects a number of gardeners each year. If you cut yourself – and you will – then it is important that at the end of your pruning blood bath you wash your hands and then bathe your cuts with an alcohol solution to ward off infection. The photos below show my lovely rose beds all restored and ready for this year’s growth. The final photo shows the all important alcohol to sterilise your many cuts. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Pruning fig trees. Most fig trees in Spain are allowed to grow into giant behemoths sprawling over gardens like something conjured up by Gandalf. Their fruit is often too high to harvest and they shade out other plants nearby. I have two fig trees: an espalier and a free standing tree. As a lover of figs both of my trees are cosseted. They are fed, netted and pruned at exactly the correct time, and in return they provide me with abundant fruit. My trees are shown below in their unpruned state. Click on each photo for a larger view.

You should only prune figs when you are sure the sap has returned to the roots as figs have a caustic sap which can inflict quite severe burns if you foolishly cut any branches during the growing season. There are many ways to prune figs, but whatever your chosen method there are two key elements.First, ensure that you have trained your tree so that you can easily reach the fruit at the height of the growing season. Second, prune to achieve an open aspect at the centre of the tree to let in maximum light and air.

The pruning method I have chosen for my free standing tree is to pollard it back to six main branches each of which have numerous stems during the growing season. For the espalier fig, I just remove perpendicular side shoots to encourage lateral growth along wires. The photos below show you both trees after their prune. Click on each photo for a larger view.

If you want to propagate your trees either to have more, or to give to friends, then this is the ideal time. Many of the branches you have pruned off will have buds just waiting to spring into growth. Choose some of the best of these; I always look for healthy strong branches with multiple buds at the end. Cut them back to about 30cm just below a growth node then dip the ends into growth rooting hormone (don’t worry if you don’t have this it probably will still work). Pot them up in free draining compost and leave them in the winter sun. With a bit of luck you will have some new trees in the late springtime.

The first photo below shows my choice of potential cuttings. This is followed by an indication of where to cut. Then the process of dipping into hormone rooting liquid. My free draining mixture one part compost to four parts soil is shown as an action photo of a trug. Finally my little cuttings ready to get going. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Cutting back Fountain grass. I have one large Fountain grass which unfortunately had died in the middle as most grasses will do over time. I split it just over a year ago and replanted 3 into my own garden and gave some to my friend Camilla who is making a new wonderful garden. Anyway, now is the time to cut back grasses. The simplest way to cut back grasses is just to use your hedge trimmers to gently trim around the plant to make a small mound shape. Do not be tempted to square the grass off (as Ayuntamientos have a habit of doing) this guarantees a short life before the centre dies back. By creating a mound you maximise the light and air to the plant.

The photos below show my little transplants before their cut back and finally how it should look after cutting. Each mound will get bigger each year until eventually the splitting process takes place again. Click on each photo for a larger view.

It’s time for the big winter cutback Part 1, and the chicken whisperer returns

Yes, it is that time of year when we gardeners have to get out there and cut everything back. Failure to take action now will mean that your garden will not fulfil its potential this Summer. Over the next few weeks I will be pruning, cutting back and generally getting my garden into shape for the coming summer. I will be working with the types of plants you have in your Spanish gardens, so just follow what I do over the next few posts and we can guarantee a lovely garden this summer.

Unlike most of you I have certain hindrances whilst doing my garden, namely: Cruella (my wife), her brood of chickens from hell, and as a special treat the idiot son has come home for a holiday and Cruella has declared him a chicken whisperer. Anyway, let’s get on with the gardening.

10th January 2024. Things I have been doing lately:

Over the next few posts I will keep you up to date with the big winter cutback, but this particular post will cover the following:

  • Pollarding Peruvian False Pepper trees
  • Pruning Sago Palms
  • Cutting back Dame de Noche
  • Pruning climbers
  • Dealing with the chicken whisperer

Pollarding Peruvian False Pepper trees: This tree can be found in many Spanish gardens. Its weeping willow type foliage and lovely little red peppercorn fruits provide an attractive tree that can grow up to 15 metres tall. However, too often the false pepper is allowed to grow into a huge behemoth that whips around in the wind and covers you terraces in discarded foliage and blocks your swimming pool skimmers. The photo below shows my tree before pollarding.

Left to grow this tree canopy would double in size over the next few years.

The secret to keeping the false pepper as a useful part of your garden landscape is to ensure that you pollard it every 5 years or so. Pollarding involves radically pruning back the main branches which reshapes the tree and encourages secondary growth that will stay manageable for a few years. When pollarding you need to use a chain saw or bow saw to cut each of the main branches about 6 inches from the base of the branch. By keeping the correct distance from the base of the branch you will not damage the branch “collar” which contains the growth instructions for the branch.

Luckily the idiot son was visiting so I persuaded him to help me pollard the tree. I had to promise him copious quantities of beer and Cruella insisted that I held the bottom of the ladder at all times. The photos below show the idiot in action with the final photo showing the finished pollard. Click on each photo for a larger view.

I wanted him to use the chain saw but Cruella wouldn’t let him
The final pollard will last at least five years

Pruning Sago Palms: The slow growing sago palm is another perrenial favourite in most Spanish gardens. These can be majestic if pruned correctly, but if just left to their own devices, they are just another green lump in your garden. There are two schools of thought on pruning sago palms. The first says that you must leave the fading yellowing fronds on the plant as they provide nutrients. The other says keep it pruned and tidy and if necessary give it a feed. I support the latter process and always prune mine back to two rows of fronds from the top. Two rows is important as if you left just one row and then these became diseased then you could lose the plant. I have two main sago palms; one is in the ground and the other in a pot. Both are shown below. Click on each photo for a larger view.

From the photos above you can see that both are due a trim. Using long handled lopers I gradually move round the trunks taking off rows of fronds until I am left with just two rows on each stem. The photos below show my handiwork.

The final stage in pruning the sago palm is to remove any pups it has thrown from the base of its trunk. These look like mini sago palms that are emerging, and you can pot these up, but that is for another days post. Today we just need to take them off to tidy up the plant. The first photo below indicates the pups circled in red. You just need to remove these with your secateurs or lopers and then the plant is left nice and tidy for the summer.

Cutting back Dame de Noche. The lady of the night which is a night scented Jasmine needs to have its final cut back now if you are to enjoy its lovely scent in the summer. You should have already cut the plant back by a third after its first flowering to allow a second flush of flowers. This final cutback can be quite drastic to encourage a healthy shapely growth. Depending on the age of your plant you can take it back to 6 inches.

The first two photos below show my dame de Noche looking straggly and ready for its cutback. Notice that I have planted my dame de Noche close to our outside seating and eating area so that we can benefit from the beautiful night scent. Click on each photo for a larger view.

The next photos show the plant cutback and ready for its final pruning. To finish the prune use your secateurs to open up the centre of the plant to take out crossing stems and let light and air in.

The final prune leaves the centre of the plant open

Pruning climbers: The trick with pruning climbers is that you do not want to lose height but you do want to reduce bulk so that you can let light into the plant. So in effect what you need to do is remove side shoots. The simplest way to do this is to run your electric hedge trimmers up the front of the plant aiming to stay away from the upward growth. Lacking hedge trimmers just use garden shears to achieve the same effect.

So far I have cut back the Solanum that grows up the side of my outside kitchen and dining area and also my column of plants that I trained up a palm trunk. The photos below show that all that is needed is to just take away bulk and bring back shape. Click on each photo for a larger view.

Before
After

Finally, don’t be tempted to feed or overwater the plants you have pruned. Wait a couple of months till you see new leaf growth and then give a light feed.

Dealing with the chicken whisperer. Whilst I have been dealing with the start of the big Winter cutback, Cruella (my wife) has been training the idiot son in the art of chicken whispering. She is trying to convince him to leave the world of Finance and become her rightful heir, or as she calls him “Prince of Chickens”. So far he is holding out, but she is making him follow a strict curriculum of chicken studies. This includes lessons in Chickenese every morning followed by hands on work with the chickens in the afternoon. Early evening is spent in the so called art of chicken whispering. The later evening is spent in the rites and mysteries of putting the chickens to bed, but I can’t tell you anything about this as I am not allowed to see what goes on.

The photos below give you an idea of what they get up to, I did have some others but Cruella made me delete them! I am only allowed to show you these ones as Cruella is using them in his graduation album. Click on each photo for a larger view.